Can somebody tell me when being a woman who loves Jesus became such a controversial thing?
I'm serious. Because somewhere along the way, it feels like simply saying you believe the Bible, love your husband, value your family, and try to live according to God's Word became something you have to explain, defend, or apologize for. And apparently, if you're a woman who believes in biblical marriage, traditional values, and the idea that God actually knew what He was doing when He created us, well, honey, you might as well go ahead and prepare yourself for the comment section. Lord have mercy.
I've been running Carry Girl Gear for eight years now, and if there's one thing I've learned, it's that people have some VERY strong opinions about what a Christian woman is supposed to look like, sound like, believe, and wear. And wouldn't you know it, some of the loudest opinions come from people who don't seem particularly interested in what the Bible actually says. Now, before somebody gets their britches in a twist, let me say something. I'm not claiming to be the perfect Christian woman. Not even close. I love Jesus with my whole heart, but I still get irritated in traffic, occasionally have to ask the Lord to help me keep my mouth shut, and have absolutely considered throwing a printer out the shop window more than once.
Sanctification is a process, y'all. And apparently, mine is taking the scenic route. But here's what I don't understand. Why have we reached a place where a woman can proudly talk about just about anything she believes, but the minute she says her faith in Jesus shapes how she lives, somebody feels the need to tell her she's doing womanhood wrong? If I say I believe my husband is the spiritual leader of our home, somebody assumes I don't have a voice. If I say I value biblical marriage, somebody assumes I'm judging everybody else's. If I say I believe God created men and women with purpose, somebody decides that must mean I think women are somehow less valuable. And I'm sitting over here thinking, have y'all actually met me? Because I promise you, nobody who knows me personally has ever accused me of being a woman without an opinion.
My husband and I have built a life together. We talk through decisions, we disagree sometimes, and we respect the roles we believe God has given us. I don't see my marriage as some kind of competition for who's in charge. I see it as a partnership with a biblical foundation. That doesn't mean every household looks exactly like ours, and it certainly doesn't mean I'm interested in running somebody else's marriage. I'm busy enough trying to keep up with my own laundry, two dogs, and a business that apparently believes the workday should have 37 hours. But I do find it interesting how quickly people assume that a woman who willingly embraces traditional biblical values must somehow be weak. Weak?
Sweetheart, I've survived things that would've knocked the wind out of most people. I've walked through heartbreak, disappointment, seasons of deep brokenness, and moments when I wasn't sure how I was going to keep going. I've spent years building a business from the ground up, worked ridiculous hours, made hard decisions, and learned to keep putting one foot in front of the other when quitting would've been a whole lot easier. And the strongest thing I've ever done was surrender my life to Jesus. Not because surrender made me powerless, but because I finally understood that I didn't have to carry everything by myself.
Somewhere along the way, I think we've confused strength with independence from absolutely everything and everyone, including God. As though admitting we need Him somehow makes us less capable. But the Bible tells us something very different. Proverbs 31 describes a woman who works, plans, buys property, provides for her household, speaks with wisdom, and isn't afraid of the future. That doesn't sound like a helpless woman to me. That sounds like a woman with some serious responsibilities and a whole lot of faith. And let's not forget Esther, who showed incredible courage when her people needed her. Or Ruth, who demonstrated loyalty and faithfulness through tremendous loss. Or Mary, who trusted God with a calling that completely changed the course of her life.
These weren't women who had easy lives or perfect circumstances. They were women who trusted God and acted with courage.
So no, I don't believe being a biblical woman means being a doormat. I believe it means learning to be strong in the ways that actually matter. Having conviction without cruelty. Speaking truth without forgetting love. Being willing to stand firm while also having enough humility to admit when you're wrong. And that last one? Whew. Still working on it.
I also think we need to talk about something that gets lost in all these arguments. Being a Christian woman doesn't mean you have to fit into some perfectly packaged, beige-colored, soft-spoken version of womanhood. Some Christian women love dresses and pearls. Some love jeans, boots, and the shooting range. Some are quiet and reserved. Others, like yours truly, came into this world with a personality that probably should've included a warning label. And you know what? We can all love Jesus.
I can be feminine and strong. I can respect my husband and still have a brain of my own. I can enjoy running a business, love my country, believe in the importance of family, and still recognize that my greatest identity isn't found in any of those things. It's found in Christ. That's what matters most to me. And that's also why Carry Girl Gear has never been just about selling t-shirts. When I put a message about Jesus on a tee, I know not everybody is going to like it. When we create designs that reflect our beliefs about faith, family, and freedom, I know there will be people who disagree. Some will scroll past. Some will leave comments. And some will feel the need to send me a paragraph explaining why I'm wrong. Bless them. At least they're passionate. But I didn't start this business to become a watered-down version of myself. And I certainly didn't make it through eight years of small-business chaos just to pretend Jesus isn't the reason I'm still standing.
Now, I want to be clear about something. I don't think disagreeing with somebody gives me permission to treat them badly. Jesus didn't call us to be hateful, arrogant, or unnecessarily cruel. And if we're going to proudly wear His name across our chest, we ought to be willing to reflect His character in the way we treat people too. That's not always easy, especially when somebody on Facebook seems determined to test every fruit of the Spirit before you've even finished your morning coffee. But it's important. Because standing firm in biblical truth and loving people aren't supposed to be competing ideas. We are called to do both. And maybe that's the part I wish more people understood about women like me.
I don't need everyone to agree with my beliefs. I don't expect every woman to make the same choices I've made. I'm not interested in forcing somebody else to live the way I live. But I also don't believe I should have to hide what I believe just because somebody finds it old-fashioned, unpopular, or uncomfortable. My faith isn't a trend. My marriage isn't a political statement. And my relationship with Jesus isn't something I put on and take off depending on who's watching. It's the foundation of my life. Does that mean I always get it right? Absolutely not. Ask my husband. Actually, don't. He's probably got a list. But every day, I'm trying to become more like the woman God has called me to be. Some days I do pretty well. Other days, I'm asking forgiveness before lunch. And I'm grateful His grace is sufficient for both.
So when did being a woman of faith become controversial? I don't know that I can point to one particular moment. And maybe following Jesus has always required a willingness to stand apart from the crowd. After all, Scripture never promised that living for Christ would make us popular. But I do know this. I'm not embarrassed to be a Christian woman. I'm not ashamed to believe the Bible. I'm not apologizing for loving my husband, valuing my family, or building a business that openly points people to Jesus. And I don't think you should have to apologize for your faith either.
Be kind. Be gracious. Be humble enough to keep learning. But don't confuse loving people with having to abandon your convictions. And for heaven's sake, don't let a comment section convince you that your identity is up for a public vote.
You belong to Jesus, girl. Act accordingly. And maybe wear a cute t-shirt while you're at it.
Love ya, Bee 🐝
Founder, Carry Girl Gear
Carry your faith. Carry your family. Carry your freedom.
